April 3, 2022

Me, Myself, and Eye Care

 

Over a decade ago I began this blog, and, as time has flown, so has my vision. With a few other blogs to maintain, I hope to post/ repost timely or timeless topics on WordPress, thus focusing my failing sight on only one site. (Pun intended.)

When I mentioned my macular hole (left eye) and macular wrinkle (right eye) to a fellow writer in my
Christian Poets & Writers group on Facebook, I learned he has a similar problem! I hope it's not a common concern among poets and writers, but if you have worsening vision, I pray these tips will help:

 

  • Place a magnifying glass in every room where you’re apt to need one.
  • Add closed captions to programs on TV.
  • Buy audio books or print editions with 14-point fonts or larger.
  • Avoid glare.
  • Get phones with large buttons.
  • Put yellow strips on the edge of each step.
  • Wear sunglasses with UV filters or lenses that darken in sunlight.
  • Zoom in and increase the size of words and pictures on your computer monitor.
  • Limit computer time.
  • Avoid wind, dust, and dryness.
  • Stay hydrated!
  • Schedule regular checkups with an Ophthalmologist.

 

If you’ve found other ideas that work for you, my eyes and I will welcome your suggestions in the Comments below. Take care. 

God bless.

 

Mary Harwell Sayler

 

January 13, 2022

When people in your presence push their politics

 

(Yes, alliteration intended.)

Are you weary of hearing heated debates over politics? If so, try turning disputes into a truce with these Bible tips.

  • All Christians have a duty to tell the truth of God’s Word: “There is no authority except from God,” Romans 13.
  • All lands are placed under God-given authority (Jeremiah 27:6.) 
  • All of the people in the crowd recognized Jesus’ authority as He taught them (Matthew 7:29.)
  • All authority to forgive has been given to Jesus (Matthew 9:6.)
  • All ill spirits must submit to Jesus’ authority (Luke 4:36.)
  • All followers of Jesus have His authority and power to use for good (Luke 9:1.)
  • All powerful people and worldly authorities have immeasurably less power and influence than the church Body of Christ. As the Bible explains:

God’s power was at work in Christ when God raised him from the dead and sat him at God’s right side in the heavens, far above every ruler and authority and power and angelic power, any power that might be named not only now but in the future. God put everything under Christ’s feet and made him head of everything in the church, which is his body. His body, the church, is the fullness of Christ, who fills everything in every way,” Ephesians 1:20-23, Common English Bible (CEB.)

Church, we have work to do! Let’s start by stopping arguments among ourselves! Let’s unite in prayer to discern the tasks the Lord has given each of us to do as the Body of Christ and His Ambassadors to the world.

 

©2022, Mary Sayler

 (Above scriptures came from searching Bible Gateway.)

 

 

 

 


January 8, 2022

Caregivers, Caretakers

Undoubtedly, our circumstances differ in detail, but my thoughts here and your Comments below might help each of us who cares for an adult with some form of dementia or an inability to process or recall information.

  • Note the attention span of the person in your care. One minute? Three?  
  • Be prepared to answer the same question or hear the same story many, many times.
  • Offer needed instructions one sentence at a time. Too much information at once frustrates and confuses.
  • Dreams might replace actual memories. Avoid arguing or saying things like, “You’re wrong” or “That’s not what happened. Change the subject, use distraction, and get out a photo album or scrapbook to boost memories.
  • Show respect and empathy, not pity, intolerance, or (God forbid!) disgust.
  • Welcome, encourage, and dwell on any show of positive attitudes such as the person’s humor, delight in little things, and appreciation for nature, you, and God.

Equally important:

  • Take care of yourself!
  • Rest whenever you can, even in snatches.
  • Stay well-hydrated.
  • Find creative outlets. Give yourself permission to color outside the lines.
  • Read up on the condition you’re dealing with and look for support groups.
  • Try not to put yourself in a potentially dangerous situation. For example, never, never stand in front of someone who looks like they’re about to pass out or fall!
  • Walk behind and be ready to grab onto a shirt or belt, not to hold the person up, but to help steady the individual until balance returns.
  • Take a walk when you need a break. If that’s impossible, try taking three deep breaths.
  • Talk to your pastor, priest, or other spiritual person you trust.
  • Sing hallelujah songs. Praise God.
  • Pray, pray, pray!

 

©2022, Mary Sayler

 

 

 


December 13, 2021

Jesus can use the Internet!

 

If you’ve ever been to church or read the Bible, you’ve surely heard Jesus’ command in Matthew 28:18-19:

 

King James Version

“And Jesus came and spake unto them, saying, All power is given unto me in heaven and in earth. Go ye therefore, and teach all nations….”

 

Douay-Rheims 1899 American Edition

“And Jesus coming, spoke to them, saying: All power is given to me in heaven and in earth. Going therefore, teach ye all nations….”

 

For those of us who never felt called to serve as missionaries in various countries, this Great Commission doesn’t seem to apply. But, if you’ve read the whole Bible, you know that God doesn’t ask His people to do something without providing the means.

 

With Christ on the Internet, we can teach all nations from our homes, offices, or mobile devices! Blogs, websites, e-zines, e-books, podcasts, e-mail, text-messages, and social media sites open multiple ways to The Way. Or, to be more precise, The Way provides and uses many ways - even cyberspace - to reach and teach us and others.

 

Remember the particular powers the Lord has been given? As Matthew 28 clearly states, Jesus has ALL POWER in heaven and in the earth. We’re talking Cosmic Connections! Wouldn’t that include satellite dishes, radio waves, and other means I don’t even know to mention?

 

The point is, everything falls under the power of the Lord Jesus Christ!

 

  • Prayers sites to connect us with one another, enabling two or more of us to make our prayer requests agreeable to Jesus’ Name….
  • Searchable Bibles online to answer questions, provide commentary, and enable us to research what God actually says about a topic, not just what we thought He said….
  • Information from trustworthy sites to help us through mental, physical, or spiritual health concerns….

 

That last thought first began this conversation. i.e., In a harrowing weekend involving lots of blood, no hospital anywhere near, and shut-downs of family doctors, I panicked! I did not know what to do. By Saturday evening, I’d looked and looked for information on the Internet to no avail. Then came Sunday.

 

I’d been praying all along – mostly “God help!” but that morning I asked Jesus to please lead me to the information needed. He did. Maybe it was the way my search changed or the way sites I hadn’t noticed before now caught my attention or the way that Christ’s presence sustained me. But, whatever way the Lord used, The Way led me to the way that calmed, that worked, that healed.

 

©2021, Mary Sayler

 

….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

November 1, 2021

Where old hotlinks go to die or worse!


If you’ve been fortunate enough to get a .com, .net, or other dot domain in your own name, do not (I repeat, do not) let it go! Ditto on other domain names that define your work. 

Unfortunately, I speak from experience! Earlier this year, I decided not to renew my domain names and keep only my blogs or other free sites. Bad idea! Within a short time, I discovered that anyone looking for my writing, poetry tips, or Bible-based websites would be led to psychic readings or, worse, a page of nudes! This was not why I spent a decade building followers! 

I suppose such shocks are to be expected: i.e. people opposed to Christianity will be ready to take advantage of the opportunities that, sadly, I created. The only way I know how to enter this battle without coming to blows is to go through my blogs and change old hotlinks to current ones. 

Last week, I spent 3.5 days turning posts into drafts, locating the worrisome links, and inserting active ones I actually want people to find. Sounds easy enough, but tedious as I had well over 1,300 posts! 

 I’m still less than half-way through this tiring task, but, Lord willing, I hope to update the remaining links this week. Nevertheless, I’m very, very grateful the Lord made me aware of this problem before I had a lot more posts to tend. 

Praise God! 

©2021, Mary Sayler 




 …

October 20, 2021

Baffling Bible Verses!

 

If you’ve read the blog posts on “A Life Worthy,” you know Michael Burns loves the Lord, the Bible, and levity – all of which we, too, greatly need. In this morning's post, however, he asked a seriously big question:

 

So many believers trust God, fear God, serve God, and yet are destitute. Why?”

 

Since Psalm 25:12-13 had evoked that question, I re-read the words Michael had quoted at the beginning of his post:

 

Who, then, is the man who fears the Lord? God will instruct him in the way chosen for him. He will spend his days in prosperity, and his descendants will inherit the land.”

 

Even though we’ll never fully understand baffling Bible verses this side of heaven, I went looking for light in study Bible notes, which generally avoided the subject. Then I looked up the verses in various translations on Bible Gateway – a practice I highly recommend, especially when a passage of scripture boggles the mind or spirit. Here’s some of what I found:

 

Psalm 25:12-13

 

Common English Bible

12 Where are the ones who honor the Lord?
    God will teach them which path to take.
13 They will live a good life,
    and their descendants will possess the land.

 

New American Bible (Revised Edition)

12 Who is the one who fears the Lord?
    God shows him the way he should choose.
13 He will abide in prosperity,
    and his descendants will inherit the land.

 

New International Version

12 Who, then, are those who fear the Lord?
    He will instruct them in the ways they should choose.
13 They will spend their days in prosperity,
    and their descendants will inherit the land.

 

Amplified Bible

12 Who is the man who fears the Lord [with awe-inspired reverence and worships Him with submissive wonder]?
He will teach him [through His word] in the way he should choose.
13 His soul will dwell in prosperity and goodness,
And his descendants will inherit the land.

 

English Standard Version

12 Who is the man who fears the Lord?
    Him will he instruct in the way that he should choose.
13 His soul shall abide in well-being,
    and his offspring shall inherit the land.

 

King James Version

12 What man is he that feareth the Lord? him shall he teach in the way that he shall choose.

13 His soul shall dwell at ease; and his seed shall inherit the earth.

 

We could go on and on to other choices, but these seem to cover various options in translating the Hebrew language into English. And each version adds light.

 

In the first line, for instance, we’re shown “fear” as awe, reverence, honor, and worship. So that mindset is the first clue in how we’re to be assured of God’s leading. The question is:

 

Do we have the right attitude toward God?

 

If so, we can count on the Lord to teach us which path to take, show us the way to choose, and instruct us through His Word. Then, the question is:

 

Do we know what the Bible says about our situation and where to go from there?

and/or

Can we sense the urging of the Holy Spirit in a particular direction that’s in line with scripture?

 

If so, we will live a good life, period. But that does not mean we’ll be problem-free or needed to find enough places to stash all our cash! Even though we “abide in prosperity,” side trips, detours, or distractions can take us into the slums! 

 

I’ve felt that. Despite my family’s faith in God, we got too close to poverty for comfort when a job transfer didn’t turn out as promised by the people in charge. At one point, I had $10 for groceries for a family of five, and yet we never went hungry. More important, because of that move, our souls were fed in ways we’d never known as the Lord provided one amazing spiritual teacher after another.

 

Regardless of our individual circumstances, every believer can proclaim my “soul will dwell in prosperity and goodness,” my “soul shall abide in well-being,” and “my soul shall dwell at ease.” How? By being in awe of God and at peace with Him and His Word.

 

That’s what King David did. He wrote Psalm 25 as a lament during a tough time, but, as often happens with psalms of woe or complaint, this one ends with the poet’s reminder to himself that God had always been with him and still was and would be. It’s like he was giving himself a pep talk – not based on will-power or emotion but on truth and the conviction that God’s abiding presence…

 

Was, is, and will be.

 

As we continue in an ever-deepening relationship with God, our values, biblical beliefs, and faith will surely influence our children for a thousand generations as promised in Exodus 20:6. And each new believer among our descendants will then add another thousand generations from their life span!

 

Maybe we’ll amass properties and land, but the true inheritance we pass on to others is the good news of our restored union with God through the forgiving sacrifice of His Son. Then, as Jesus promised in Matthew 5:5, “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.”

 

©2021, Mary Sayler

 

For more light on this complex subject, find your favorite translation of the Bible and read it, cover to cover, then keep on reading (it or another version) a little at a time. Hopefully, this previous post can also help, “Settling Down with Jesus.”

 

September 20, 2021

Learning to See God

 

Many of us ask how to hear God better, but maybe it’s more basic to first learn how to see.

 

The Bible gives us a comprehensive picture of God.

 

We get a wide-angle view of God and His ongoing interactions with mankind by reading the Bible cover to cover, preferably in more than one translation.

 

For an up close and personal relationship, we zoom in by becoming acquainted with Old Testament worshipers and by reading the Gospels and seeing how God clearly shows Himself in the character, wisdom, healing acts, forgiveness, and love of His Son Jesus.

 

Creation reveals the power and majesty of God.

 

The universe invites us into the unknown and helps us to see and acknowledge the ongoing mystery of God.

 

The earth displays the colorful variety and creative beauty of our Creator. As we exercise our own creativity in the light of God’s image, we see tiny details, enormous diversity, and infinite possibilities.

 

Personal, local, and world events help us to see our need for God.

 

As we become aware of a problem, large or small, we might see something specific to pray about, trusting God has a purpose for whatever He allows.

 

Godly friends and family help us to see God.

 

In both the Old Testament and the New, God calls us into community through family, friends, and fellow worshipers, each of whom has a unique way of seeing God’s hand in their lives and ours. These perspectives help us to expand our own view of our loving God.

 

Confession removes blinders so we can better see.

 

Bible Gateway provides many translations of a key-to-seeing verse in Matthew 7:5. As you look through a few of these, notice the repetitive phrase involving seeing:

 

…first get the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye,” Amplified (AMP.)

 

First take the log out of your eye, and then you’ll see clearly to take the splinter out of your brother’s or sister’s eye,” Common English Bible (CEB.)

 

…first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye,” King James Version (KJV.)

 

…remove the wooden beam from your eye first; then you will see clearly to remove the splinter from your brother’s eye,” New American Bible, Revised Edition (NABRE.)

 

“…first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye,” New International Version (NIV.)

 

Confessing our mistakes allows us to see clearly again, which brings discernment and a faultless view of God.

 

With clear, discerning vision, we can see and perceive God in circumstances, other people, and ourselves.

 

Then we can recognize the light in and around us.

 

Then we’ll be apt to look for good.

 

Then we can see and be love as God sees us into His Kingdom.

 

 

©2021, Mary Sayler, poet-writer, lifelong student of the Bible

 

 

 


September 17, 2021

How To Go Around Imitating God

 

Each morning I receive an email from Bible Gateway with the verse for the day. After reading various translations on the site, I then select one to post on Twitter, but today’s verse threw me:

 

“Imitate God like His own dear children,” Ephesians 5:1, and I thought, “How can I possibly do that?”

 

I went on to other things that needed tending, but the verse kept coming to mind. When I finally sat down to give it more thought, the creation story in Genesis came to mind.

 

As we follow this first biblical passage about God, we find these first steps toward imitating God:

 

Be creative.

Be a peacemaker, a problem solver. Bring order from chaos.

Be light, and bring light to others.

Be a caretaker of the environment, starting where we are.

Be a protector of animals.

Be aware that all peoples come from the same Creator God, even if they don’t know it.

Be respectful of others and yourself.

Be in constant communion with God.

Be ready to work and ready to rest.

Be Love, Beloved.


 

©2021, Mary Sayler

 

September 14, 2021

You're Cordially Invited to the Reading of God’s Will

 

We, the people of God, often speak of God’s Will, and each of us most likely has an idea of what that means. For an accurate reading of God’s Will, however, let's see what God's Word says:

 

God’s Will is for no one to perish. God wants us to turn from ungodly ways.

“The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance,” 2 Peter 3:9, New King James Version.

 

God’s Will is for everyone to be saved. We agree with His Will – and help to put it into motion – as we pray for everyone.

“…I ask that supplications, prayers, petitions, and thanksgivings be offered for everyone… for all in authority, that we may lead a quiet and tranquil life in all devotion and dignity. This is good and pleasing to God our savior, who wills everyone to be saved and to come to knowledge of the truth,” 1 Timothy 2:1-4, New American Bible (Revised Edition.)


God’s Will is for us to trust Him, no matter what!

In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you,” 1 Thessalonians 5:18, King James Version.


A Will does not go into effect until death occurs.

God’s Will went into effect with the death of Jesus Christ, Who overcame death to save us for Eternal Life in the Lord.

 

God’s Will is for all to live in God forever.

“For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day,” John 6:40, New International Version.

 

God Wills to save the world!

“For God loved the world in this way: He gave His One and Only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send His Son into the world that He might condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through Him,” John 3:16-17, Holman Christian Standard Bible.

 

 

©2021, Mary Harwell Sayler, poet-writer, Bible reviewer, and compiler and paraphraser of the Book of Bible Prayers, which was researched on Bible Gateway as was this post

 





August 16, 2021

Wising up! Praying for wisdom

 [Note: Our rural church, Lake Como Community of Hope in Lake Como, Florida, is non-denominational with several retired pastors of varied church backgrounds gracing our pulpit each week. Every now and then, however, scheduling conflicts or unexpected personal concerns leave us without a pastor to lead that day’s worship service. Since Sunday August 17 was such a day, I read the recommended Bible readings from the Revised Common Lectionary, used by many Christian denominations then presented the following “Bible Talk,” based on the reoccurring theme of wisdom.]


1 Kings 3:3-14
Psalm 111
Ephesians 5:15-20
John 6:51-58

With COVID again on the rise, we’re wise to wear masks in public, but Lord willing, we will all have unveiled faces soon! Meanwhile, let’s keep praying for the Lord’s healing presence in our lives. In fact, let’s pray right now:

Lord God, heavenly Father, thank You for bringing us together in prayer, worship, and fellowship with You and with each other. In many ways, Lord, these are troubled times, but we trust You to protect, heal, and guide us, our families, and our church. We praise You and thank You for being with us as we come into Your presence and Your Word in Jesus’ Name.

As you probably noticed, the big theme in the Bible readings this morning is wisdom. So, truth time: Are you wise?

Do you want to be wise?

Have you ever asked God to give you a gift of wisdom? If not, ask! If so, you have it! Believe it. Claim it. It’s yours.

Hearing Solomon’s prayer again this morning, I remember the first time I heard that Bible story in 1 Kings. Solomon was wise enough to ask for wisdom, and the request pleased God so much, He gave the king gifts of wisdom, understanding, and discernment – unsurpassed until Jesus came.

But God also promised to honor Solomon with riches and a long life. And the truth is: that’s what I wanted. I probably wasn’t as interested in having wisdom as having more money than my 50-cent allowance allowed!

Despite my questionable motivations, wisdom is ageless. I first saw wisdom in my children when they were too young for an allowance of any kind! For example, my daughter was about 5 when she came home from Sunday School, puzzled. The teacher had been talking about people in other countries who didn’t know about God and/or did not believe in Him. My daughter looked at me sadly and asked, “But wouldn’t we believe that too if we lived in another country?”

Most likely, yes. And that brings us to a message about wisdom in verse 10 of Psalm 111. i.e., Knowing God, believing in God, and, especially, being in awe of God is the beginning of wisdom.

Wisdom keeps us out of trouble! As we’re reminded by today’s Epistle reading in Ephesians 5, we’re to live – not as unwise people – but as wise. This can require head knowledge, but mostly it requires the ability to know how and when to apply knowledge in a wise and timely manner.

Ephesians 5 goes on to point out the need to be filled with the Spirit as we sing scripturally-sound songs, regularly read God’s Word, and faithfully give thanks to God the Father for everything – everything – in Jesus’ Name.

Christ lives in us and redeems us from humanity’s Fall from Grace in the Beginning of Time. Before that one act of disobedience brought spiritual death and troubles to everyone in the world, Adam and Eve had wisdom! They walked with God. They heard God speak. They had fellowship with Him – until opting for Knowledge over the Wisdom they already possessed.

Remember? They disobeyed God when they ate from the forbidden fruit of the Tree of KNOWLEDGE of Good and Evil. From that moment on, they no longer had the innocence still apparent in today’s young children, but they could not turn back. No one could – until Jesus came along!

Jesus redeems the times. Jesus renews our fellowship with God and breathes new life into us – the life of the Holy Spirit. Jesus gives us peace with God, peace with other people, and peace with ourselves.

As the Wisdom of God with us on earth and beyond, the Lord knows what we need. He alone has full KNOWLEDGE of the good and no-so-good thoughts, acts, and traits in us. He alone can rescue us from ourselves.

The Gospel reading in John reassures us that Jesus gave Himself for the life of the world to be transformed into life with God. But that’s only the beginning. To live out our time on earth more fully and faithfully – and joyfully – we need Wisdom to guide us. And all we have to do is ask!

As we read, study, and talk about the Bible, we can see that God has made promise after promise to us, individually, and to the church Body of Christ throughout the world. Our part is to believe, respond, claim those promises, and ask for whatever we lack, knowing God will provide. And why wouldn’t He? We are His ambassadors – representatives of Christ in the world. Surely, the Almighty God, Creator of the Universe, and Heavenly Father of All does not want us to speak for Him foolishly nor would He want us to act unkindly – unwisely – toward anyone else.

God has not only given us wisdom for the asking, but He’s also given us power to use that gift as we’re enabled and guided by His Holy Spirit.

What a powerful purpose we’ve been given – to help others and, indeed, to influence the whole world as we spread the Good News of forgiveness and salvation in the Resurrected Christ! Even Solomon didn’t have that. The young king had hope of a long life on earth because God Himself said he would. But to us, God promises an even longer life – one that never ends!

That’s not the kind of power I thought I might get as a child, and, as you might have expected, I haven’t received the massive wealth I had once hoped to get!  But what a wealth of wisdom widely available to all who ask – wisdom:

  • In the book of Proverbs (attributed to Solomon!)
  • Wisdom in the Gospels – the Good News of Jesus Christ
  • Wisdom in communal worship, fellowship, and Bible study
  • Wisdom in praying for ourselves and one another – in praying for our church home and Christians around the world
  • Wisdom in the gift of God that comes to those who ask!

Let’s ask now:

Dear Lord God – Master, Possessor, and Provider of All Power, All Wisdom, and all the Wealth of the earth and universe, we ask You now for the gift of discernment and the wisdom to lead the kind of life to which You have called us. We praise You, Lord, for forgiving us and lifting us into Your compelling love. And we thank You for giving us the power, authority, and every other provision we need to carry out the work You have given us to do in Jesus’ Holy Name.

 

©2021, Mary Harwell Sayler

 

 

 

 

 

 

August 9, 2021

Too much garbage? Break the cycle!

 

In the almost eighteen years we’ve been in our home, I’ve filled and faithfully set out the recycling bin every week – until now! Reportedly, a shortage of workers recently caused pickup to cease, so our paper, plastics, foil wrappers, and aluminum cans have wound up in the back of the regular garbage truck! Bummer! So what’s an environmentally conscious person to do?

 

Someone suggested I take my own recyclable wastes to the town dump, which isn’t far, but I lack both a truck and the energy. Nor do I see myself applying for a job with a recycling company, which I might actually have considered, say, thirty years ago.

 

But here’s the thing: Thirty (okay, forty) years ago, I did not have much to recycle. For one thing, we lived in the country and had fresh vegetables, so I don’t remember buying anything but coffee in a can. To us, however, a “can” was a glass Mason jar filled with fruit or veggies, steam-bathed, and capped at home. When it came to colas, kids weren’t allowed, and my soft drinks mainly came with a restaurant hamburger – and a paper straw.

 

Obviously, times have changed, but did they need to change this much? I don’t want to turn back the clock, but I do want to ways to wave off a flood of garbage. If you do too, I hope you’ll share your ideas in the Comments section below, and maybe we can stop this trashy tsunami.

 

For starters, here’s what came to mind:

 

  • Get cloth napkins off the shelf and onto the table.
  • Buy eggs in those greyish cardboardy crates of 18 or 24 instead of plastic by the dozens.
  • Ask the grocer’s meat department to use butcher paper.
  • Wrap sandwiches in wax paper.
  • Keep leftovers in glass containers with lids.
  • Buy fresh or frozen foods in lieu of canned.
  • Go back to drinking milk and squeezing juice.
  • Replace soft drinks with tea, coffee, or, better yet, water!
  • Sip through a stainless-steel straw. (I found a set online.)
  • Shop with cloth bags.
  • Wear washable masks.

 

That’s all I’ve got! Hope you’ll have more to add soon.

 

And may God help us to be good caretakers of this beautiful earth we share.

 

©2021, Mary Harwell Sayler

 

 

 

 

 

July 19, 2021

What did that compliment do to you?

 

Assuming we have no ulterior motive, such as buttering up or trying to manipulate someone, a compliment can a lift a person’s spirits. However, it can also have a negative effect.

 

At the risk of making you (and me!) afraid to ever say anything nice to anyone again, I’ve been pondering the subject and remembering what helped me and what did not. I hope you’ll share your thoughts in the Comments section below. Meanwhile, here’s what came to me.

 

A compliment can encourage.

 

The pastor-leader of a discussion group once asked us to tell each other something we might not be aware of otherwise. One woman looked at me and said, “You have a lovely smile.” Since my sweet-spirited dad did, it pleased me to know I might have received that from him, and so the compliment encouraged me to smile more.

 

When a compliment is obviously meant to be supportive, we can take that word to heart, thanking the person – and thanking God for lifting our spirits and/or guiding us in a particular direction.

 

A compliment can discourage.

 

The person giving a compliment might be appalled to know this, but a negative result can come in self-consciousness! This often happens when we compliment a person’s looks, rather than a well-chosen outfit or skin-flattering choice of colors.

 

Unfortunately, I did this recently when I told a friend she looked elegant. She did, but I wish I’d been more specific and told her how a particular, upswept hairstyle makes her look elegant. Then it would be her choice or decision as to whether she felt up to elegance that day!

 

Similarly, poets, writers, and other artistic people might wonder, “Will I ever create anything as good?” or “Will people like my next work as well?” Book reviews, positive Comments on a blog, or a simple “Like” for a post can provide the timely encouragement that person needed.

 

A compliment can provide an opening to praise!

 

Whether a compliment focuses on what we did, how we look, or what gifts and abilities we have, we can thank the person for the acknowledgement and give credit to God. For example: if someone says, “Your (poem, painting, sermon ___ fill in the blank) meant a lot to me,” we can accept that good word yet get the focus off of our self-conscious selves by praising the Lord and thanking the person for letting us know.

 

Hmm. I just realized that one of my favorite prayers since childhood can be applied to this discussion, which I hope you will join in the Comments below!

 

Let the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer,” Psalm 19:14.

 

What we say (words of the mouth) and how we receive what someone else says (meditations of my heart) can find anchor in the Rock and, when needed, be redeemed by our Father God Who rescues us, even from ourselves.

 

©2021, Mary Harwell Sayler

 

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