Showing posts with label respect. Show all posts
Showing posts with label respect. Show all posts

January 8, 2022

Caregivers, Caretakers

Undoubtedly, our circumstances differ in detail, but my thoughts here and your Comments below might help each of us who cares for an adult with some form of dementia or an inability to process or recall information.

  • Note the attention span of the person in your care. One minute? Three?  
  • Be prepared to answer the same question or hear the same story many, many times.
  • Offer needed instructions one sentence at a time. Too much information at once frustrates and confuses.
  • Dreams might replace actual memories. Avoid arguing or saying things like, “You’re wrong” or “That’s not what happened. Change the subject, use distraction, and get out a photo album or scrapbook to boost memories.
  • Show respect and empathy, not pity, intolerance, or (God forbid!) disgust.
  • Welcome, encourage, and dwell on any show of positive attitudes such as the person’s humor, delight in little things, and appreciation for nature, you, and God.

Equally important:

  • Take care of yourself!
  • Rest whenever you can, even in snatches.
  • Stay well-hydrated.
  • Find creative outlets. Give yourself permission to color outside the lines.
  • Read up on the condition you’re dealing with and look for support groups.
  • Try not to put yourself in a potentially dangerous situation. For example, never, never stand in front of someone who looks like they’re about to pass out or fall!
  • Walk behind and be ready to grab onto a shirt or belt, not to hold the person up, but to help steady the individual until balance returns.
  • Take a walk when you need a break. If that’s impossible, try taking three deep breaths.
  • Talk to your pastor, priest, or other spiritual person you trust.
  • Sing hallelujah songs. Praise God.
  • Pray, pray, pray!

 

©2022, Mary Sayler

 

 

 


September 17, 2021

How To Go Around Imitating God

 

Each morning I receive an email from Bible Gateway with the verse for the day. After reading various translations on the site, I then select one to post on Twitter, but today’s verse threw me:

 

“Imitate God like His own dear children,” Ephesians 5:1, and I thought, “How can I possibly do that?”

 

I went on to other things that needed tending, but the verse kept coming to mind. When I finally sat down to give it more thought, the creation story in Genesis came to mind.

 

As we follow this first biblical passage about God, we find these first steps toward imitating God:

 

Be creative.

Be a peacemaker, a problem solver. Bring order from chaos.

Be light, and bring light to others.

Be a caretaker of the environment, starting where we are.

Be a protector of animals.

Be aware that all peoples come from the same Creator God, even if they don’t know it.

Be respectful of others and yourself.

Be in constant communion with God.

Be ready to work and ready to rest.

Be Love, Beloved.


 

©2021, Mary Sayler

 

May 28, 2021

Do unto Yourself as you do unto Others

 

This morning I commented on the pretty shade of yellow my husband was wearing, then added, “Good color on you too,” to which he immediately said something, well, smarty. Now the thing is, he hates it when I do that! He does NOT like for me to be dismissive of a compliment or give a negative response, so I told him:

“Hey! Do yourself what you want me to do!”

Beloved, we might be onto something here! As Christians, we’re keenly aware of the biblical command: Do unto others as you want others to do to/for/unto you. Even beyond that, Jesus took the Golden Rule further by asking us to treat others The Way He would treat them.

Jesus’  Platinum-Golden Rule can guide us deeply into a Christ-centered life.

With Christ at the very core of our being, we need to be aware that our Lord treated Himself with respect (John 8:49) and looked out for His own well-being as needed. For example, I found these relevant scriptures from a variety of translations on Bible Gateway, which I subsequently paraphrased:

They picked up stones to throw at him, but Jesus hid Himself in the crowd and left the temple grounds, John 8:59.

At Jesus’ words, the people in the synagogue were filled with fury. They rose up, drove Him out of the town, and led Him to the crest of the hill on which the town was built, intending to toss Him down, but He passed through the midst of them and went on His way, Luke 4:28-30.

In the Garden of Gethsemane, Jesus sweated blood – literally – over the mere thought of crucifixion. Three times, He pleaded with God the Father to find another way, but when He knew the time had come to offer Himself as the final blood-life sacrifice, He gave Himself over willingly – not to the demands of people, but to the will of God.

Why? As the Son of God and the son of Mary, only Jesus had the Personhood and power to become our Messiah and offer Himself in payment for our sin. Only Jesus had – or could have – that particular mission in life. Only Jesus had to endure crucifixion as the final offering for our sin.


Whether in word or deed, however, crucifying ourselves accomplishes nothing godly or good.


Sadly, we might not even realize we’re doing this. I’m reminded, for instance, of a friend who faithfully serves the Lord by selflessly serving others. Lately, though, she’s been concerned about her own health yet admitted she’d made no attempt to schedule the needed tests as soon as possible. I encouraged her to do so, but before I got downright rude about telling her what to do, I asked, “What would you want me to do, if the situation were reversed?” and she admitted she would give me the same advice.


We’re well aware that the Bible tells us to “Love our neighbors as ourselves,” but we might need to consider what that means in practical terms. If, for instance, 
we don’t take care of ourselves, how can we take care of others? If we’re unkind to ourselves, what chance do we have of being genuinely kind to other? If we have no love or respect for ourselves, how can we possibly show that to anyone else? 

In situations large or small, people often ask, “What would Jesus do?” but let’s also ask:

What would Jesus NEVER do?

Surely, Jesus would not willingly neglect Himself, abuse Himself, nor put Himself down!

Surely, Jesus would not let Himself be trampled nor hurled over a hill!

Surely our gracious Lord would not refuse a gift given in love – even if it’s nothing more than a broken vial of perfume or a sacrificial word of praise. Who knows? When Jesus appears in a bright yellow shirt of sunshine and glory, He might like to hear, “Oh, Lord, that color is perfect on You!”

 

©2021, Mary Harwell Sayler

 

 

May 13, 2021

If only I had known


Long before text messaging reduced words to their first letters, writers and editors referred to a commonly over-used plot as IOIHK – “If only I had known.

Books, movies, stories, areas of miscommunication, and misspent lives have infamously fallen into the IOIHK category. But in this time of rampant misunderstanding between various peoples and traditions of faith, we poets, writers, pastors, teachers, parents, politicians, caregivers, and other leaders can be mindful of cultures, levels of maturity, and opinions unlike our own. 

Remember:

If Only I had Known often means we didn’t bother to find out!

The remedy, of course, is to check our emotions and check the facts.

  • Ask questions to clarify.
  • Listen – truly and intently.     
  • Aim to hear another perspective.
  • Research.
  • Investigate both sides.
  • Look for workable solutions.
  • Show respect.
  • Build bridges.
  • Embrace the blessing of diversity!

Can we do this on our own? Probably not! But we can agree to pray for God to help us to be open to other perspectives and peaceful possibilities for healing.

©2021, Mary Harwell Sayler, poet-writer


P.S. If you're writing a book or script, please be sure IOIHK is not the story plot!

 

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